Have you ever put yourself in your significant other’s shoes to see what it feels like to be a visitor in someone else’s “lifestyle” sport. My husband, Tim, is the quintessential non-horse guy that has been a great supporter of all of my equestrian pursuits. This week I learned just how great he has been because we have been in Hawaii to watch the best in his sport, surfing
OPPOSITES ATTRACT: LAND & WATER
Tim is an amateur photographer that has surfed since he was a small boy. The Billabong Pipe Masters has been on his bucket list of professional championships to both attend and photograph. Last Wednesday launched this prestigious event that showcases only the best athletes of the year competing on the World Surf League (WSL) Professional Tour. In hunter/jumper terms, the environment is essentially the WEF of the surf world with the top professional athletes, major sponsors, necessary support staff and fans relocating to a short stretch of Oahu’s North Shore for approximately 2 months. In terms of competition and prestige, it is comparable to Show Jumping’s Longines Masters Grand Slam.
BACKGROUND
Tim and I are from California, but we currently reside landlocked in the Pacific Northwest. Although I complain about the lack of a hunter/jumper community in our region, I have found a nice group of peers to ride with and my horse is a major part of our daily life. Surfing for Tim, though, is limited to destination trips with other surfers to other countries and our short trips to California. For the time being, our geographic limitations have made my sport a much larger part of our lifestyle.
FIVE TIPS FOR SHARING YOUR SPORT
During this week’s trip, I grasped how to be a better partner in sharing my lifestyle hobby with both my husband and non-horse friends. The most important take-aways include:
1) DROP THE NITTY GRITTY DETAILS. Simplify your explanations so that you don’t lose your partner’s attention. Here is an actual conversation I recently lead: “Today we worked on getting him in front of my leg and we did a gymnastic where we trotted into a one stride bounce to a two stride ramped oxer.” In hindsight, all I needed to say was, “ I’m so happy, we did an exercise that helped us both really improve today.”
2) EXPECT BOREDOM. Hours of watching any event can be boring. I remember my husband once telling me that flat classes “are like staring at an aquarium.” Don’t be upset if your partner mentally checks out. I brought a book on Audible to Pipeline and listened via my I Phone. My husband was just happy I was present and understood I needed breaks.
3) PROVIDE A SCHEDULE. You might enjoy watching your friends in the evening’s hunter derby after you have been showing all day, but if your partner is a non-horse person it is best to not expect them to want to stay. Keep your partner informed of your schedule and when it is best for them to be at the event.
4) NO QUESTION IS DUMB:\. How many times have you explained the difference between hunters and jumpers and everything in between to friends and family visiting at a horse show? Appreciate that your partner is just trying to be engaged at the event and our terminology is probably a foreign language to him or her.
5) COMMUNICATE YOUR APPRECIATION. Make sure to tell your partner how much you appreciate them supporting your activities. Equestrian sport is a lifestyle choice that requires both significant time and resource commitments. Your partner’s emotional support is invaluable.
This week my learning curve regarding the competitive surfing culture exponentially increased due to Tim including me in meeting his friends and explaining the nuances of the event. More importantly, though, I now better understand what it is like to be a foreigner experiencing someone else’s lifestyle activity. This entire experience on the North Shore of Hawaii has taught me to be more patient, compassionate, and appreciative of the support my husband demonstrates for all of my daily equestrian activities.
Aloha,
0 Comments